my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
