All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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