A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
