I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
