i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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