white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
