At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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