do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize