if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I'm at about main and main street
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
