You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
