He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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