they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
