the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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