Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize