marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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