dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
