I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
