What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
