Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
