Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
