I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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