So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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