Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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