found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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