his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
