Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
