Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
