Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Randomize
