just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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