Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

After last night, I could never be a politician.

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(712): View more from Iowa

I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.

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(416): View more from Ontario

dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening

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(651): View more from Minnesota

You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?

(1-651): View more from Minnesota

yeah you don't forget that shit easily

(651): View more from Minnesota

We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.

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(406): View more from Montana

Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me

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(701): View more from North Dakota

I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"

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(574): View more from Indiana

I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.

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(907): View more from Alaska

Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in

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(803): View more from South Carolina

She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.

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