I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
