About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
