At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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