i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
