when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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