just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
