Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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