So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
