And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
