just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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