There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
