i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize
