Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
