you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Randomize
