Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
