when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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