brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
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