In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize