Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
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