there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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